by Furry Girl

06.12.12

"But Sexual Harassment law was never designed to protect women from merely feeling uncomfortable.  In a typical workday, men and women alike face many sources of discomfort: atheists face clerks wearing crosses; able-bodied people face colleagues in wheelchairs; Fundamentalist Muslims and Jews face professors dressed with arms and legs uncovered; the infertile face coworkers' desks with photos of their kids, and parents are given time off for parenting events such as piano recitals.

No, the law is designed to simply create a level playing field of opportunity—not of emotional experience.  It doesn't require anyone to be a mind-reader, it doesn't undo the normal uncertainties of social interaction, and it doesn't require anyone's social skills to be smooth as silk.  Occasionally feeling offended is still considered part of the cost of being out in the world.

[...]

The topic is particularly poignant when the people involved are progressive political activists.  If we expect to go out and communicate effectively in a world that is often hostile to our ideas, we need to have the emotional skills to tolerate a wide range of responses.  If we can't even handle a friendly sexual invitation in a genuinely safe environment without losing our composure, how can we tolerate the rough-and-tumble of the world out there?"

-- Dr Marty Klein in Sexual Harassment or Unwanted Sexual Attention? on sexualintelligence.wordpress.com

 





8 Comments

  1. It's an important topic. I have to tell people every day that they have no right to NOT be offended by things. Being offended is NOT the same as being abused.

    Comment by Kristin Guttormsen — June 12, 2012 @ 4:09 pm

  2. '...how can we tolerate the rough-and-tumble of the world out there?" ' - Exactly. When I was going through basic training (Australian Army), a couple of the delicate flowers objected to the frequently colourful language of our corporals. I had to ask them, 'If a bit of swearing brings you to tears, then how the fuck are you going to handle it when you're in Afghanistan being shot at?'

    Comment by Stick — June 14, 2012 @ 4:36 am

  3. She does around the end of the article lump porn in with prostitution, clitoridectomies, and forced child-rearing. Otherwise really enjoyed the article. Keep up the good work.

    Comment by jason — June 14, 2012 @ 7:46 am

  4. Kristin: Exactly. There are countless times when I see people ascribe "sexism" to something that could, at best, be considered "rude."

    Stick: That's an interesting perspective, I hadn't thought of this issue as it might pertain to the military.

    Jason: Marty's a man, actually, and he's not anti-porn at all. That list was not one of "all these things are the same," but a list of things which inflame controversy.

    Comment by Furry Girl — June 14, 2012 @ 2:47 pm

  5. I think MK should have described or reposted the incident in question more fully, as I can see why the speaker would find the couple's approach at least a tad sketchy:

    http://skepchick.org/2012/05/sex-and-the-keynote/

    Still, it's pretty clear the Skepchick blogger in question doesn't distinguish between "creepy" and "harassing" and really twists the idea of "workplace harassment" to try to fit the situation into it. Never mind that the sketchy swinger couple in question were not persistent nor were they in any kind of situation of power over the speaker, either of which would seem to be key in making the situation rise to the level of sexual harassment. But according to the author, merely being "offended" and being in some kind of "professional" role at the convention makes it rise to that level.

    Oh, and according to some other lovely feminist blogger, MK is a "creep" for writing what he did:

    http://freethoughtblogs.com/butterfliesandwheels/2012/06/squicked-again/

    Comment by Iamcuriousblue — June 16, 2012 @ 12:34 am

  6. Skepchick has another post on this topic. Klein looks more and more like a tool.

    "The leadership was left scurrying around not because I am a whiny complainer, but because the couple acted inappropriately and then immediately left the premises to avoid any consequences. They left before I could respond. They left before I even looked at the card. The leadership did not immediately know how they were going to handle the situation because _they_ felt that it needed handling. In fact, I said that I understood if they did nothing… because, really, the conference is over and the couple was gone, off to another state. But Carl felt that this was a big deal."

    http://skepchick.org/2012/06/psychology-today-blogger-your-facts-are-irrelevant-woman/

    Comment by Rob T. — June 27, 2012 @ 5:06 am

  7. Marty Klein is awesome. I can't even pretend to give the atheist feminists' opinion actual consideration when that novel-length ranty blog post is based on the idea that Marty Klein is a sexist liar who hates facts, and that nonsensical argument is "backed up" by a bunch of stupid meme-type photos about how he's an asshole with some kind of anti-woman, pro-oppression agenda. Bitches be crazy.

    Comment by Furry Girl — July 1, 2012 @ 1:28 pm

  8. I know quite a few married couples at work and in every case it is the woman who has made the first move to get "her" man. Why not the other round as chivalry would have it? Because no bloke in his right mind is going to risk losing his employment, future career propspects and possibly even face the draconian feminist Stasi, who have wormed their way into every company's management and "human resourcing" department, by initiating a relationship with a female work colleague. (Oh, I am English and in England if you don't know what the word "Pom" means).

    Comment by Pom — July 21, 2012 @ 9:53 am

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