7 Comments »

1. I like your policy. Its the same I would apply to my pot dealer (who is also a good friend). If I got caught, its all on me, and I wouldn't throw him under the bus - because it was a harmless thing we did together.

   I wonder, too, if some of whats behind these sex workers speaking out is an attempt to, I don't know, justify their actions, or pass the blame 'Yeah, well, I may be a whore, but HE'S a senator who is seeing a whore! He's soooo much more worse than me! Nyah!' in a self hating way. Its one thing to cooperate with the police - its another to write a book about it.

   Comment by Wendy Blackheart — May 23, 2011 @ 2:37 pm

2. Last time I got busted, the cops tried all that. "If you would just cooperate, tell us who some of your clients are, maybe name some other people you know in the business."

   I pretended I didn't know what they were talking about, and wouldn't say anything. I didn't give up anyone. Any client information I kept was encoded with PGP.

   When we finally got to court, the cop (who fabricated much of what he wrote in his report, and left out all the stuff about him being naked and having fingers in me when he busted me) couldn't get his lies straight, and the prosecutor got so frustrated she offered me a deal- Charges dropped and expunged if I'd go to a one-day "Prostitute education class".

   That was an experience. All the others there were street hookers, and most had very sad, tough, situations. Mostly the education they wanted was how I managed to do as I did. They were amazed I'd gone ten years without being caught, and that I charged several hundred dollars an hour.

   The women teaching the class were pretty cool. At lunch (baloney sandwiches, I didn't eat because I'm vegetarian) we chatted, and they admitted that they were cool with what I did, and mostly were about trying to teach the street girls to stay safe.

   Comment by Comixchik — May 24, 2011 @ 5:10 am

3. I've gone on record a number of times with the same opinion as yours, FG. Dante placed betrayers in the lowest circle of Hell, and I'm with him in that regard. People like Kristin Davis, who sell out their clients, are IMHO the scum of the Earth, and in an upcoming column (June 4th) I elect Miss Davis to my "Hall of Shame" for her attempts to curry favor with prohibitionists by misrepresenting other whores, and for her recent ratting out of Dominique Strauss-Kahn (who even if he's guilty of rape deserves to have his case decided on the facts rather than unsubstantiated accusations made from the sidelines by publicity whores).

   Comment by Maggie McNeill — May 24, 2011 @ 7:43 am

4. I was recently talking with anot
   her distance sex worker who stated that she would go to jail rather than betray a client. Even though she's an atheist she felt the words sacred trust described the disclosures we receive. I think she's absolutely right - and love the point you make about criminalized sex work's patrons and providers both being allies against the interference of the state.

   I haven't ever given such a disclaimer prior to a session with a new client, partially because it sounds incriminating - but my privacy policy regarding client info is on my companion website. I think these same ethics apply to outing, discussing their private sessions in an identifiable way without their ok (except in cases of blacklisting), inquiries from persons claiming to be significant others... It's both a political alliance and a personal responsibility.

   Comment by Sabrina Morgan — May 24, 2011 @ 7:05 pm

5. I thought I might get some serious angry comments on this one, but not yet. I'm sure there are sex workers out there who believe that since the odds are already stacked against us, we should do everything we can (including betraying clients) to get ahead.

   Wendy: Yeah, it is partly a bully behavior, which is akin to the sex worker hierarchy of a stripper looking down on a porn star who looks down on an escort. People love to say "...but at least I'm not ____!" to make themselves feel better.

   Comixchik: Good for you for not falling for the "it will only work out for you if you blame other people." I'd actually find one of those de-hookering classes to be interesting.

   Maggie: I have dated a number of guy who do security work for big companies and government contractors, and they're all covered by all sorts of non-disclosure agreements with employers. An interesting thing I have in common with the cute security consultants is that both of our jobs are, in part, a job of keeping other people's secrets. Selling people's info to tabloids is a serious betrayal, even if it is the secrets of someone who's possibly a rapist.

   Sabrina: Yeah, I guess that disclaimer does sound sketchy, but I felt like I wanted to express something up front. If I ever more actively seek domination/strapon clients, I'd put something worded more gracefully on my web site under a privacy policy. (Do many sex worker web sites even have privacy policies? I don't think I've seen those commonly.)

   Comment by Furry Girl — May 25, 2011 @ 12:14 pm

6. The thing to realize is that anything you say, once busted, will be used against you. The cops are not interested in making it easy for you. They only want to strengthen their case, and if you talk you help them.

   By squealing on clients, and other sex workers, you're only giving them leads.

   One of the dirtiest things I've heard the cops doing is telling the women they arrest that unless the women cooperate, and name names, the cops will see that the woman's children are taken away.

   That's why, although normally talkative, once arrested, I have nothing to say. Nothing.

   Comment by Comixchik — May 26, 2011 @ 8:00 pm

7. I'm a bit late to the party: but yeah, I would not sell out, not to the police, and as I live in a country where the police have far less power to threaten people doing sex work because of the (current) laws, would not sell out to the press either. On the one hand I hate to judge a girl for getting more money to spill to the papers than she ever got from the idiot footballer who paid for her; on the other hand, I can't help the creeping feeling that girls like that don't *get* it. What the point of the job is. What the money is actually for.

   Comment by Belle de Jour — June 1, 2011 @ 3:52 am

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