18 Comments »

1. I think that if I could be assured that it was safe and that my name wouldn't be smeared across grad school applications later, "Isobel Wren, HOOKER" I would do it. B/G porn sounds so concrete, your picture and video is out there forever. If you decide you don't like doing it, the proof stares at you and in this society, brands you.

   In being an escort one could live out the fantasies of anonymous sex with strangers and add that to the fantasy of being cherished and compensated for one's body but without the possible negative effects of proof of your "misdeeds" surfacing later. I'd jump at the chance in a situation like you describe. No police? No hard work at vetting clients? Better protection against STDs? Hell yes.

   Comment by Isobel — April 20, 2010 @ 4:45 pm

2. Definitely.

   Comment by Alexa — April 20, 2010 @ 11:04 pm

3. I certainly agree that most people wouldn't do it... I had actually considered doing an escort style hustle for awhile, but the male market for that is pretty rare, and I'm just not good looking enough. I just ended up doing a solo porn instead..

   I had actually lined up a guy to do some stuff with but chickened out... I'm hetero and not at all into guys to the best of my knowledge, which was mainly why I had a problem with it. There really isn't a heterosexual option for dudes as it is, and well, there barely is one for gay dudes anyhow, since it doesn't seem too hard for most men to find other men to fuck if they aren't completely hideous...

   But yeah, I guess to answer the question, I certainly considered it.

   Comment by Royce Icon — April 21, 2010 @ 4:47 pm

4. Totally.

   Comment by Alex — April 23, 2010 @ 6:30 am

5. I've actually been turning this question around in my head for some time now, and I've been unable to find a satisfactory answer for it. The reason for that is if, even if I somehow managed to find a safe, regular person, what if when they walked in I wasn't even slightly attracted to them? My pussy would just freeze right up.

   I find this interesting because I try (emphasis on "try") to be open minded, sex positive, etc. I think people that don't get laid because they are short, fat, disabled, or what have you have been wronged by culture. And yet it's pretty obvious to anyone who knows me that I have a "type", and I feel like I've had some of my most satisfying sex with people that look/act/think a certain way. Thus, I think of people who can escort, or in fact do any kind of sex work, as being more sex positive than I am because *who* they are having sex with is something that carries less weight with them than it does with me.

   And yet I don't know if this is reasonable either. I can think of a violinist and say, "Well, I don't want to pursue that line of work, but I don't feel like my lack of interest in music wrongs people." And I've enjoyed reading your refutations to people who think sex is lessened somehow by it being paid for, but I recall artists who have thought the same about music or painting. I guess I think of my sex as if it were a hipster band that would change in ways I didn't like if they suddenly started taking money, but that doesn't make the paid musicians any less important. Both types of thought have made a mark on the world.

   Comment by Molly Ren — April 30, 2010 @ 6:24 pm

6. Absolutely not. I couldn't do it. I have no moral objection, it's just not for me.

   Comment by Nose in a book — May 3, 2010 @ 7:09 am

7. If you had asked me two years ago, I would have said yes. Even January of 09, I was trying to get into a cisuy's pants, because I shockingly felt attracted to him. I realized I wasn't 100% anti cis cock.

   That said, I believe my current partner would protest. Which I'm ok; it's in our relationship rules that other partners are either kink or porn specific.

   But, yes, this little dyke would have said yes.

   Comment by Essin' Em — May 3, 2010 @ 3:41 pm

8. I think lots of people toy with it on the fantasy level that you mention (like the person commenting on twitter), but those sorts of fantasies are much like rape-fantasies, they're appealing in your head because of course there ARE no real risks.

   I've toyed with the idea numerous times, I'm not certain that I would really say any of them were truly serious, but it's there. I think my feelings have changed over the few years, recently I was mulling the question over again in my head and found myself less certain than I was before. I think the concept itself doesn't necessarily bother me, but I think I would have to be in a certain headspace, which I'm not always in. Because we're not talking about someone I chose to spend my time with on my own, but specifically is paying me to be around (among other things), which is to me is perhaps a strange kind of charity. I'm more inclined to give of myself for free to those who need it than I am to demand payment. And I think perhaps demanding payment, for what I think should be freely given, clashes with my own personal sexual ethics, but it's sort of fuzzy here.

   Also, I think repliers to your post may be skewed more towards being interested than the general population due simply to the content of your blog. I definitely think most people are inclined towards sex work.

   Comment by Ari — May 4, 2010 @ 2:42 am

9. Aren't* that is.

   Comment by Ari — May 4, 2010 @ 2:42 am

10. I am a 44 year old male. Not fat...not bald..not ugly...but, all the same, not George Clooney either.

    So, here's the reality. If a woman wanted to sleep with me, either I'd be attracted to her and able to get it up, or not attracted to her and not able to get it up.

    If I was attracted to her, I wouldn't need to be paid (I'd pay).

    If I wasn't attracted to her, paying me wouldn't accomplish anything for her. She'd be hiring a wet noodle.

    To leave erections out of the picture. If I wasn't attracted to her, and she was happy with oral only, then I'm not a good enough actor to be anything better than an organic stimulating machine.

    To be an escort (and lets pretend for a moment I'm 25 again, and not too bad on the eye) you need to be able to act...or at least engage somehow with someone who doesn't turn you on. Not everyone can do that well. Escorts differ in both physical appeal AND in their skill at putting average people at ease.

    I've been with an escort who is so young and beautiful that were I to have met her on civvy street I would have been utterly intimidated. But, I went back to her because she's lovely, not because she's hot. I've been with an escort who has such a high libido that she gets off on you when she's only just met you, and comes and comes...(she looks like a young Audrey Hepburn). I could never have done what she does...it's a rare personal characteristic. Top escorts sell a SERVICE not a body.

    That is to say, the point is moot.

    Comment by ivan appleton — May 5, 2010 @ 3:40 am

11. Thanks, everyone, for the comments. I ask the question more as a "moral" one than one of say, "Do you feel confident enough in your looks to try escorting?". It interests me to hear from others about why they haven't taken that route. (For me, it's a fear of being assaulted or arrested, or possibly contracting a disease, coupled with the fact I don't have the time to market myself and screen people and find polite clients I'd want to have an ongoing professional relationship with. It's not that I'm "morally" opposed.) The conversation I had with my naked boy was one where his opinion was more that if you take away the hassles and risks, everyone would want to be an escort, at least occasionally. I think that even without a lot of hassle/risk, there's still this other boundary most people don't want to cross for various reasons. It's interesting to hear different views on those various reasons.

    Comment by Furry Girl — May 5, 2010 @ 6:40 pm

12. I do agree with Ari here; you're probably getting a skewed sample. That being said, with all of your stipulations, yes, I would do it. I don't have any moral qualms about selling my body, though I understand where other people are coming from. I don't know whether I'll be going down that route in the future, but it's something I've considered in the abstract (it could help support my writing hobby!) and definitely something Ive fantasized about.

    Comment by Lila — May 6, 2010 @ 10:41 am

13. I am aware this is a "skewed sample", thanks. The point is obviously not to poll 1000 completely randomized Earthlings. I wanted to hear from people who are already sex workers- or at least, sympathetic to sex workers.

    Comment by Furry Girl — May 6, 2010 @ 4:26 pm

14. I once or twice attempted to dip my toe in the escort pool, going so far as to post ads looking for men. I'm actually remarkably good at getting along with just about everyone, and think I would have made an awesome courtesean back in the day. I'm sure I could have sex with someone I wasn't particularly attracted to if there was suitable compensation involved.

    I don't have any moral issues related to having sex for money - I think its a perfectly valid way to make money. Sex workers *work*, it isn't an easy business. I have much respect for anyone who can pull it off.

    However, the thing that gets me, and sometimes it seems silly, but I have issues with sleeping with, say, a married man. Couldn't do it. I can't sleep with someone who is partnered without consent from their partner. It makes me feel awful. And its not like you can screen a client for his relationship status.

    Comment by Wendy Blackheart — May 13, 2010 @ 11:43 am

15. I have toyed with the idea 4 over a year now. i called an escort agency and the guy and i became frds, but i didnt have the guts. we speak regualarly on the phone and he is now interested in me. My problem is i am married and i also became pregnant around the time i wanted to do it :(

    i just like the idea of fucking for money. i dont need it, i just want the excitement. So instead of going with complete strangers i do not kno, i decided to 'service' about 3 of my frds who really wanna fuck me. (my agency frd included) the other 2 are in relationships. i am not sure if i'd do it for sure, but i definitely think about it. (posted an ad on Craigslist jus to see if i'll get a response, but like i mentioned, i dont like the idea of strangers)

    Comment by thinkingaboutescorting — June 2, 2010 @ 9:20 am

16. I have absolutely no moral objection and if you can find me a woman then I'd jump at the chance. While I wouldn't need to be explicitly attracted to the client I think I'd need a certain level of attractiveness, there are some people you couldn't pay me a million dollars to sleep with.
    As has been mentioned above the problem for hetero boys here is that there doesn't seem to be (at least from outside the industry) much of a market for female clients and male escorts.
    I've had offers from male friends of friends before and have considered it but given sexual adventurism isn't my strong point even in a longterm relationship the idea of doing it with a man is a bit intimidating. And therein lies the second problem and I think probably many peoples objection. Not the morality, not the clients attractiveness, but just the fear of something bad happening, whether it being the client being violent, police or as in my case the simple fear of having the anal cherry popped.
    Of course the effects on long term relationships are another problem...

    (Sorry about the long post)

    Comment by Logan — June 16, 2010 @ 5:09 am

17. Yes, I've already done it. I charge 300/h, it's incredibly boring but quite lucrative. Go for it!

    Comment by J — February 1, 2011 @ 3:18 pm

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    Comment by Trackbacks — February 5, 2012 @ 3:36 am

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