Comments on: Webgirl rant: Captain Dumbass versus the billionaire bimbo

By: nico

nico — Sat, 28 Aug 2010 03:11:31 +0000

I've got to agree most with Ivan Appleton's analogies, while at the same time still sitting here amazed at just how much this post has opened my eyes to the reality of what goes on. I once met a Minnesota escort at the burlesque club I'm a scenester at, and she was visiting New York, and the makeout we had in the corner (she'd arrived with someone else but it didn't seem to matter to her much) put her in my mind over the next few months as someone I might want to contact later; eventually, I did, but being back in Minnesota as she was, the cost of one night and one following-afternoon of time with her plus round-trip airfare actually worked out to be around $3000. Instead of realizing the things that your post made me realize just now, I emailed her back angrily, saying basically that "no one pays three thousand dollars for sex, not even for a sex worker." She of course got immediately mad at that and broke off our potential arrangement, and now, after reading this post, I definitely regret my behavior, even if I simultaneously don't quite regret not-spending $3K on escort-time (I could not have afforded it and I told her so even before my final words to her). I really wish I had gotten to this entry long before even considering sex-worker services, and even now, I haven't found someone of that woman's quality who both charges less and is as human as she showed herself to be. It's one of the more recent shameful-behavior examples I've had and although I still severely doubt I will ever pay $3K for someone's time (sex or not), I definitely will never insult such a person again for her prices seeming absurd, because now I know just what it all entails. Like I should have known all along, really.

By: Ivan Appleton

Ivan Appleton — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 08:23:29 +0000

Well, he was rude and arrogant, but not extremely so. I might (?) have some insight here. I work as a college professor, and the relationship between professor and student is in one small way like that between a sex worker and a client. That is, the professor looms large in the life of the student, such that in a one on one consultation in the office, the student may get the impression that they have some special relationship with the professor, whereas the professor might deal with many, many students, such that the individual student is but one in a crowd. Sometimes, a student starts to get demanding out of naivety rather than arrogance, emailing incessantly, calling at the office door for help. The other work the professor has to deal with is invisible to them (at which point the professor has to have words with the student, in a gentle way). Could it not be similar with a client who you find troublesome, only moreso, given the illusion of connection that the internet gives? He might actually think that he has a unique correpsondence with you. I say this also because after visiting the escort I see, I am compelled to email her afterwards, and it takes a few emails on my part, and a gentle rebuke on her part, to remind me that the professional relationship was bounded by the time we were together, and will be renewed only when I wish to make another booking. It is tough, I know she only sees a client a week, and I am her only repeater, and I like her very much. It feels only natural to keep corresponding after the meeting, but it is in fact a breach of the unique agreement that all obligations are met by services rendered and payment made, and I need to be reminded of that. I know too, that she sometimes discloses some past hurts and sadnesses, and it is very hard not to offer comment later (not doubt projecting...I don't know).

By: Flinthart

Flinthart — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 12:55:02 +0000

Roland Emmerich? Meh. Just how many explosions and alien spacecraft can you get in a $75 film, anyhow? Give me a $75 Peter Greenaway flick. I may have no idea WTF it's about, but at least it'll have a few minutes of decent soundtrack...

By: The Sexy Psychic

The Sexy Psychic — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 09:19:54 +0000

I so agree with this post! I am new on niteflirt and already I am getting the dumbasses. I have worked privately as a sex worker and men don't understand that we may only make that 120 dollars an hour for that day! They have no clue. I think the women clients are so much more understanding about the getting paid issue.

By: Alexa

Alexa — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 20:54:41 +0000

Excellent points, especially the one about the photos of middle aged crotches! lmao ;-)

By: Furry Girl

Furry Girl — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 20:47:28 +0000

Thanks for the comments, ya'll. @Alexa: Many of them are polite about bugging me for free sex, but I still find it irritating. (My site plainly states right next to my contact info that they are NOT to email to ask to have sex with me.) These guys lack the social maturity to understand that just because they want to have sex with ME, I don't automatically want to have sex with THEM. Some of then seriously can't wrap their heads around that, and will "argue" by pointing out how badly they desire to fuck me after I reject them. I also get random dudes sending me photos of their junk, with the message, "Now you owe me a free membership since I shared with you". They don't seem to understand the most basic principal of economics: it's only valuable is someone wants to pay for it. Photos of the crotches of random middle-aged men aren't worth anything, but the market says that photos of me are worth a $20 membership fee. Likewise, I wish they could figure out that if the market has said that *photos* of me are a commodity that people pay for, *actual sex* with me would be a commodity priced much higher. If a postcard of Paris costs you a dollar, I don't know why people would expect the trip to Paris itself would be free.

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By: Alexa

Alexa — Thu, 27 Aug 2009 14:19:54 +0000

Ahaha! You go, girl. I wonder if other types of sex workers ever get this, or is it just a porn chick thing? Speaking only for myself (as an escort), I don't generally. It's painfully obvious from the get-go that I charge for my time, regardless of how it is spent, so I don't have to deal with the kind of bullshit you're describing here. What I do get is a lot of guys wanting to "meet me for coffee or tea" to see if the chemistry works, blah, blah, blah. I have to remind them that I charge for my time, not for specific services. I still think that's a lot less bullshitty than what you have to deal with. I know other women who have sites like this that have described the *exact* same thing to me.

By: Sabrina Morgan

Sabrina Morgan — Thu, 27 Aug 2009 06:47:19 +0000

"Never try to please the people who have nothing to offer you." - That phrase deserves to be the new unofficial sex workers' motto. I love the armchair businessmen. Every industry has them, ours are just stickier. It's even funnier when they're also crying poor. I'm always tempted to point out that if their business acumen is so fantastic, they should take their own advice, hang out a shingle and start making enough money to afford me. I am not the Mother Teresa of adult. If they can't afford me, it's not *my* fault. Thanks for posting this.

By: aagblog

aagblog — Thu, 27 Aug 2009 03:33:55 +0000

After nearly 3 years of reviewing porn, I can confirm that Cap'n Dumbass' expectations are indeed way out of line.

There are sites out there that will give him what he wants, but he'll have to pay way more than $20 a month for them. Your fee is more than reasonable for the amount of content you carry. He sounds like a major asshat.